Archive | May, 2011

I am humbled

20 May

Francis Frangipane in his book Holiness, Truth, and the Presence of God says, “Anyone can pass judgment — but can they lay down their lives in love, intercession and faith for the one judged? Can they target an area of need and rather than criticizing, fast and pray, asking God to supply the very virtue they feel lacking? And then persevere in that love — motivated prayer until that fallen area blooms in godliness? Such is the life Christ commands we follow!” (pg.11)

American Idol…..

19 May

So I’ve been just a so-so fan of Scotty.  Yes he can sing — but some of his actions and facial expressions drive me crazy — started calling him Scotty McCreepy.  Anyway, Idol just showed his hometown visit and he was so emotionally touched by the outpouring of support….well I gotta say I was touched by his reaction….very genuine….nice to see that instead of the attitude that of course you are wanting to see me.

I wish I could type with my mind

19 May

Okay — so as I read that — it makes very little sense.  I think what I’m trying to get at is that I wish that I had a continuing transcript running in my head….that I could pluck out, review and edit at my leisure.  There are many issues that I struggle with and many that I also celebrate.  I also have found that when I write some of the thoughts and questions down I can work through and find more clarity on the subject (Thank you God)  So there are times when I’m driving down the road and can’t write or do anything else to jot down my ramblings without having an accident.

Just a gentle nudge or sometimes a kick in the pants

9 May

So my post of yesterday…well in my email this morning from both my bible reading and devotion from Proverbs 31 came the clear voice of God reminding me of his love and mercy

Psalm 32:5  Finally, I confessed all my sins to you
and stopped trying to hide my guilt.
I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.”
And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.

And from Marybeth Whalen at Proverbs 31 ministries:

“Bring them here to me.” Matthew 14:18 (NIV)

When I am overwhelmed: “If you can’t do it, just bring it to Me.”

When I am angry: “If you can’t do it, just bring it to Me.”

When I am hurting: “If you can’t do it, just bring it to Me.”

When I am confused: “If you can’t do it, just bring it to Me.”

Thank you Lord for your gentle reminders that you love me where I am and will help if I ask.

Turning on a dime

8 May

Sometimes I amaze myself….not always in a good way.  I marvel at my ability to go from very warm and loving to the absolute opposite — cold and bitter or angry.

Sometimes it comes out of the blue — sometimes there’s a decent warning because there are certain touchy subjects or individuals that can set me off…..especially when it’s the same person who gets under my skin and just irritates me because they are breathing and to make it worse, sometimes I just revel in the anger, I gloat over their inferiority, I wallow in the disdain..

And then…..I feel like a failure and that I’m letting both God and myself down…..I know there is a way to find victory over this but I find myself doubting it would be permanent, I guess because I know me and my weaknesses….and figure I’ll just get mad again…..There is no finality to this…no neat wrap-up.  Just a rocky path I need to let go of….